During this time of putting my words together and asking God to guide me through his plan, I’ve also been praying for a revelation of what he wants this to accomplish.
I was talking to my mom after my post yesterday and I said “Mom if I can reach just one person and help them out of an abusive situation, I’ll have succeeded.”
Honestly, I believe that with everything I have. Just one person. If one person hears my story and wants to know how I did it and starts believing that they can do it too, I feel like that will be the greatest gift God could give me.
But then a friend reached out to me. She asked if I would consider speaking to groups of women, groups of teenagers, sharing my story and helping them realize the greatness that God has designed for them. Never one to turn down an opportunity to speak into a mic, I said absolutely.
Then I cried because this feels like such an incredible work. This feels so much bigger than me, because it is. God will not stop with one person, he’s going to use this to help so many people, more than I can possibly imagine.
Isaiah 42:3 says “A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out. In faithfulness he will bring forth justice”
In faithfulness. In trusting. In loving. In praying. In worshipping. He will use me.
I don’t read my bible as much as I think I should. It’s one of those things that in the past, I’ve been scared to discover what he would tell me. Now, I’m exposed to the bible on a weekly basis and what I’ve learned is that he won’t use his word to beat me down and tell me everything I’ve done wrong. The exact opposite actually. His word lifts me up. He tells me how much he loves me, how much he wants an abundant life for me, and best of all that he’s truly forgiven me. Every sin I’ve committed and will commit, it’s taken care of. He took care of it.
My kids have started asking when we’re going to switch back to the country station, the Disney station, the rock station, etc. because I’ve found a home with contemporary Christian on Pandora and I can’t bring myself to listen to anything else.
Hello, my name is
Just be held
Oceans (Where feet may fail)
Trust in you
I need a miracle
Boldly I approach
These are a few songs that feel like my bible through my day. They’ve given me courage to write these words. They give me a lift in my voice as I’m driving down the highway to my next store. Besides that, has God ever spoken to you through Pandora? Taken over the playlist and given you songs that you need at that very moment? It may be the most powerful message you can receive.
Maybe it’s just me that he speaks to through Newsboys but I’m pretty sure I’m not. God is working in this world through people that choose to love as he loves, through people that take a chance when they don’t know what the result will be, through people that are broken, through people that give up control.
There is a lot to fear. Ask anybody, especially right now. Every time I turn around someone is telling me that the end is near. That we need Jesus to return because otherwise we’re all doomed.
I look at them with this look on my face that my husband describes as my ‘are you for real?’ face.
Jesus is already here. His kingdom is here and it’s battling against a darker kingdom that is also here. It’s been that way since Adam and Eve brought sin into this world.
We can’t eliminate sin from this world. That is a challenge that I would never accept. I can speak my truths, my experiences, and what Jesus has done for me though. I can trust in him and have faith that when my time is over, I know where I’ll be going. I can help people, I can love people, and I don’t have to beat them over the head with his word. Jesus called me to walk the walk, not talk the talk.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m still human, I’m still going to screw up. For example, I threatened to keep a child home from school today because she either ignores me when I talk to her or mumbles an incoherent answer. It drives me crazy. I didn’t keep her home though, I softened my voice and we came up with a solution for her morning chaos. Then I told her I loved her very much and sent her into class.
My point here is that I can’t live without sin, so how can I expect anyone else to? I have no right to judge anyone unless I’m willing to tell myself that God couldn’t possibly love me which is an absolute lie. He loves me so much that I’m reduced to tears every time I sing about his love.
All of this to say, this season is going to be big. I can feel God working in me, and I’m open to his plan. That’s all I can do. Be open and pray for the constant reminder to love every person I encounter. There will be many of them.